I love playing games. Not emotional games that screw with peoples' heads or hurt somebody else...but child-like games played for sheer pleasure, fun, and excitement. The actress in me just loves a good round of make believe.
As a grown up, this has also manifested in a kind of joy for different sorts of games. The sexy kind. Don't worry, I'm not going to use this as a forum to tell you all about my kinky self, but I found a pretty great connection the other day that might be worth sharing.
I have a friend who was about to embark on his first rendezvouz with a "cougar". Now, I doubt this term requires any elaboration, but for those of you who live under a rock, urban dictionary does a good job of explaining the cougar phenomenon here. Anyway, my friend was getting ready for his date and expressed a bit of apprehension, fearing that the situation might be awkward.
Being the loyal and pro-adventure friend that I am, I tried to reassure him. I told him that he should just treat the whole thing like a game. A dirty little game. Its not like they both didn't know what was going on, or how it would probably end. There was no use in denying it, so why not treat the whole interaction with that kind of sassy, knowing smirk? It adds this other layer of doing something "taboo and naughty" that only makes the situation that much sexier.
I drew a comparison from my own experience. I went out with a guy a few times who I found interesting and attractive, great in bed, but not exactly dating material. Did I mention he was great in bed? This fact kept his number in my phone, to be called upon as necessary. It was a matter of convenience and good times, two things I can never turn down. The one tricky thing was that we had mutual friends and professional acquaintances, but obviously desired discretion when it came to our little arrangement. No one wants to be the slutty talk of the town...or lose out on other opportunity based on a bunch of rumors. So we started to play a little game. That game where we would show up at the same function, exchange brief pleasantries, and move throughout the party flirting, chitchatting with others, having very distinct and separate good times, knowing that we would wind up in a cab home together at the end of the night. The 'pretend to barely know you until were playing footsie in the cab' game is very sexy. It was my favorite part about that liason. The game made everything that much better: it made me feel naughty, him seem sexy and aloof, and the hole thing feel very bad ass and hot. Its not like the game was all that necessary (it didn't really matter if anyone knew, we were both single and just messing around) but it sure was fun. And ensured that we never got awkward and ruined everything by taking ourselves too seriously.
The point was to love the game, the adventure, and the sexy challenge of it all. There's no point in worrying about what might happen and the fun lies in letting the thing play out the way it will. That's the thing about fantasies; be it a cougar or a dirty little secret. They're larger than life, based in myth and the idea that anything can happen. So you might as well sit back and enjoy the ride.
